Tuesday, December 01, 2009
"dearest you do know what to do
it's your heart that can betray you.."
i think we can all afford to be magnanimous.
and accept everything thrown at us
everything.
when we use it as a means to reconcile with ourselves.
we can definitely do that
when we're all tired of trying
and start to embark on the process of numbing.
i couldnt hate
because that takes strength as well
and im already too tired
towards the end
it was your name that caught me
when i can hardly remember your face.
it's just too bad that i should sink once too often
and feel too much.
undiscovered
8:30 PM
Saturday, November 28, 2009
but i am living prove;
of what love
is about
couldn't keep giving excuses
if it gets me stuck right here
shouldn't lie to myself
if it allows me to see but not feel or act as i should
shouldn't.
but i will act the way i want to.
regardless of what others think
regardless of how you respond
regardless of how it'll compound all the stupidity
i still miss you sometimes.
undiscovered
5:47 PM
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
i keep forgetting.
i keep remembering.
):
undiscovered
10:29 PM
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
why am i still blind
im dying inside.
think it's time.
no?
on the rollarcoaster ride, we share the highs
but im always alone at the lows
undiscovered
4:43 AM
Thursday, October 29, 2009
i guess this episode will follow me forever
because never have i been treated this way
ever.
and i wonder what happened to my usual outlook on such issues
maybe they are thrown away cause i really want to work things out
but tell me, how can i
when you keep breaking me
and i overcompromise every single time?
ive been hearing too much
from everyone, from you
but i have tried
and because it's in you
so i accepted it all.
although i do have a thousand things to say
i didnt.
cause at the end of the day
it doesnt really matter anymore
i rather handle it myself.
at least i wont feel that im taking in too much of ur excuses
that you prepared for every single situation
i felt it easier. kinder for me in fact
if i shoulder everything.
plus i really dont want to be a source of your burden
if im significant enough to begin with anyway.
even so i felt this post is just another major understatement
):
undiscovered
2:45 PM
Friday, October 23, 2009
braveheart.
so what?
i find it laughable.
whether i consider it to be stupidity, naiveity, selective ignorance
or just waiting for the expected unexpected show up in front of me.
like now.
so i guess my first experience is dead then.
along with it- myself.
tell me what to believe,
when the faith is just so frail.
undiscovered
7:25 AM
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
but it was my weakness all these while
that drove me on til now
like a rusty lock with the missing key
that you had thrown it free
always saw all there was to see
the affection you bestowed so liberally
to others- and- me?
but what about the secrets you hide but denied?
and so the clockwork stopped
i waited for the spring to unwind; the truth to drop
a broken toy for your whims and pleasure
but i will entertain no more.
-------------------
there's always something new
images that register in my mind
something that keeps pushing against me
something that refreshes each new view
something that makes me wonder
why my heart had remained intact through it all.
it kept me far from you
untouchable. so im undamaged inside.
undiscovered
1:09 PM
